Tuesday

13.

And I'm drawing the pictures
of the pieces of you
That I miss the most
But something is missing
Something's just not right

So I go outside with
Birdcage in hand and
Camera in my eyes
Hoping to capture the colors
And fill in the white

But the sun had been swallowed
And all I could see was the swollen
Grey belly of the beast
And that's when I knew 
Everyday without you here

Would be colorless.

-----

Let's never part, shall we?

(Old.)

12.

Letter 1:

Dearest,

I wish I didn't have to
ask you to tell me that
I'm beautiful. I know
I'm not but at least lie
to me.

Lie to me sweetly.
Love me gently. 

Sincerely yours.


Letter 2:

Dear,

I went to the cemetery,
where the stone pillars
and lonely names were
the only eyes to see me 
cry.

Leaves are spilling over
man made boundaries,
and I'm starting to think:
Life never had it this hard
before.

Sincerely.

Letter 3:

       ,      


I'm waiting for you 
with every breath 
I take. 

.              

-----

Letters from the lonely heart.

My, what a downer..

(old.)

11.

How do I put this
Eloquently. 
Though, eloquent isn't
The word I would use
To describe what I mean
To say.

No.

My words should not be
Eloquent.
Because eloquence was abandoned
Along with me
And my heart.
Thrown to the side
Put on hold.
Wait until I'm better
Before you can heal.

So tell me,

How do I put this
Truthfully.
Because the truth has
Always been 
Elusive.
The truth doesn't exist
Not like it used to, at least.
It ran away long ago
Hid itself behind your teeth
Bleeding as you bit your
Tongue harder to keep it from

Escaping.

----

I say.

 I've done it again.

(old.)

Part 3.

Luther let out a surprised cry and quickly whipped around. Leaning against the doorway was Shava. Her body was slim and her curves were perfectly outlined by the tight yellow tank-top and the skinny jeans that she wore. But it wasn't the enticing lines of her body or the alluring call of her voice that kept Luther standing there like a fool. No, it was the girl's blue eyes shining in that porcelain face of hers. They were deep but bright, and they had a sparkle about them that hinted at an intelligent curiosity. 


A moment of silence passed between the two before the girl pushed off the doorway and made her way over to the bed. Luther's eyes never left her. He was absolutely entranced by her, the way her hips swung, the flow of her platinum blonde hair which was pulled back into a pony tail. For a second, Luther could imagine himself on top of her thin frame, one hand gently running down the length of her body as the other tugged her hair free, letting it pool out underneath her precious head. He quickly banished the thought though, ashamed that he was already lusting after this girl when they haven't even said three words to one another.

'She's actually said five to you,' whispered a voice in the back of his head. 'You're practically to third base.'


Luther winced, trying desperately to silence the voice as Shava sat down on the smooth silk comforter of her bed. Her eyes scanned the room for a minute before landing on Luther, who wanted to crawl out the door and disappear. She was very beautiful, yet very intimidating as well. 


"Well now," she mused.


Luther started a little at the sound of her voice breaking the silence. His skin was like pins and needles and his stomach was tying itself into knots. What was she thinking? Was he in trouble for looking at her valuables? He was going to leave soon anyway. Why couldn't she just dismiss him, release him from the invisible hold she had on him?

'This is what you wanted, wasn't it?' whispered the voice in his head. 'To see her?'

Yes but not like this, he thought. Oh how stupid he must look right now in the eyes of this girl, which were scanning him now with curiosity.


His brown hair was messy with sweat and hard work, bits and pieces sticking up here and there. He wasn't tan but he wasn't as pale as her, and Shava figured that by the build of his body he probably wasn't the outdoorsy type. To the normal passer-by, Luther was average: average height, average weight, average teenage boy. But to Shava, he seemed... different. 


------


Different is getting to be quite normal, these days..

Sunday

Part 2.

It was indeed a spiraled staircase, and a long one at that. The stairs where short and steep, and Luther had to watch where he stepped in fear he might trip over his own feet. The air within the staircase was hot and condensed, and Luther could feel the sweat starting bead on his forehead. 

'No wonder O'Brian gave me this job,' thought Luther ruefully as he made his way around and around. 'No one else wanted to do it.' 

After a few minutes of walking, a cool breeze of fresh air was starting to waft down the shaft, brushing lightly against his face. 

'I must be getting towards the top,' he thought excitedly and he quickly picked up the pace. Finally, the staircase led him out into a room. 


Luther stood for a moment, drawing in the size of the room. It was large, larger then any room he head seen so far, besides the main entryway. In fact, it was large enough to house a grand piano in the far right corner. By the looks of it, it stayed here all year round, tucked safely under a white sheet so that the dust couldn't touch it's shiny black skin. On the wall opposite Luther there was a large stained glass window with a mural of two doves, their bodies folding into one another as if they were performing some intricate dance. Luther was entranced as the colors from the glass splayed out onto the floor, illuminating the mahogany like magic itself was spilled across it. 


A moment passed before Luther was able to snap himself from his revery. He looked to his left and saw the hall that O'Brian had described. Quickly, he made his way down it, his eyes soaking in the intricate wallpapered patterns that graced the walls. Before he knew it he was at the end where a small, round window was open just a crack to let a gentle autumn breeze in. Luther smiled a little, welcoming the friendly breeze as he carefully managed the box into the crutch of one arm and opened the door to his right with the other. It swung open to reveal a medium sized room. A large queen sized, four post bed sat with a regal air in the middle, it's quilted headboard with its back against the opposing wall. Luther looked around, taking in the lavender smell that matched the rich, deep purple color of the walls. This was definitely a ladies room. Not only that, it was Shava's room. 


Luther gulped and quickly made his way into the room, setting the box down in the far left corner, then quickly made his exit. He felt intrusive and rude walking into this girls room like that, and he wondered aimlessly whether she felt at all like her privacy was being intruded upon every year when the movers came. 


He quietly made his way back down the spiraled staircase and into the main hallway, which was starting to fill up with beautiful furnishings that accented its already magnificent features. These men had done all this in the same amount of time that it took him to carry up one measly box, and Luther could feel an embarrassed blush start to creep up the back of his neck. 

'I'll be faster,' he silently swore to himself as he walked out the double doors and back to the U-Haul. And faster he was. The boy almost became an unloading machine, a worker ant of sorts. He was methodical and precise, making an A-line across the floor and up the stairs then back again in no time flat. He had fallen into a routine of unloading, carrying, dropping, walking, and unloading again. The three hour mark was approaching now, and Luther had successfully unloaded all of the boxes except for one, which he was now religiously carrying up the spiral staircase. 


"Ha!" he cried as he entered the hallway to Shava's room. He walked in and set the last box down, straightening as he clapped his hands together. His prideful gaze looked over his handy work and he couldn't help but feel a surge of accomplishment welling up in his gut. 

"Wait till I tell O'Brian about this," he muttered to himself, a content smile plastered on his face. After a moment, his eyes wandered from the boxes and started to scan the room itself. By then, Luther felt comfortable being in the room and even comfortable enough to look around the place. 


The boy grinned as he slowly made his way around the room. He started on the right at the bed stand sitting prestigiously next to the bed, and worked his way clockwise. Next came the closet, whose doors opened with a gentle sigh as Luther peeked curiously into it's seemingly infinite depths. He felt dizzy at the size of it, practically the size of his own bedroom at home, and he quickly shut it and continued his perusing of the room. He made his way around to the far left wall where a white vanity mirror stood, little nick-knacks and memorabilia sitting pristinely in front of the large, illuminated mirror. 

"No wonder they say she's so pretty. With a mirror like that, I'm sure any girl could make herself look beautiful." 


"I'm glad you think so."


--------


Oh my oh my oh my goodness.

Friday

Part 1.

The days in Summerville had grown shorter as winter approached the small town. Dr. Ricardo and his family were just moving in to their winter vacationing home at the top of Pikes Hill and, of course, were the latest talk of the town. Each year during the middle of September, the doctor would migrate his family of two to the mansion perched on top of that hill, and each year the town of Summerville would wait with baited breath for a chance glimpse of the elusive family. But each year, the townsfolk would be disappointed and at the end of February, when the first buds began to bloom, the house would be empty once again and once again the Ricardo family would slip quietly back into the world outside the small bubble of Summerville. 


As the movers began to unload the fine furniture and precious valuables into the mansion, a boy of roughly 19 stood at the bottom of the hill and swore that this would be the year he would glimpse the rumored Shava Ricardo. She was said to be the most beautiful mistress to have ever graced the town, besides her mother, and he was determined just as any other boy would be to see for himself if this were true. 


'Oye! Luther Ulrick! Is tha' you standin' down thar?' 


The boy looked up in surprise to hear someone calling his name in a thick irish accent, someone from the other side of the rot ironed fence. Standing at the top of the hill amongst the bustling men was a short and stout burly looking man. He had a fiery red beard that hung down to the middle of his chest and an intense gaze that could send even the firmest man into quivers of fear.

Luther stared as his own green eyes met that gaze and he felt a chill run up his spine. The man held it for a good second or two before a smile broke out onto his rugged face and a deep, hearty laugh rolled through his body. He was indeed your stereotypical Irish man. 


"Come on now, boy. Don't just stand thar with your mouth open like a half drowned fish. Come 'elp me with unloadin' these things and I'll pay yah 'alf a days wage."


Luther's heart leaped into his throat as he stared up at the man, his mouth falling open a little bit more. "A-Are you sure, Mr. O'Brian? I'm not really a professional, you know."


"Aye! I'm sure. Now get up 'ere, and make it quick! I don't 'ave all day," commanded the man.


Luther quickly scrambled over to the main gate and fumbled with the latch for a few seconds longer than he wished he had before he managed to push his way through. He then quickly dashed up the long drive way and was by Mr. O'Brian's side in no time, his chest heaving up and down from the distance ran. 


O'Brian looked the boy over, an incredulous look on his face as an amused glint sparkled in his eye. "Took ya long enough," joked the man as he gave him a hearty smack on the back. "Now then, I'll need your 'elp bringin' in the smaller boxes for the bedrooms. I don't trust your gangly arms with any of the major stuff." He chuckled as he lead Luther over to one of the U-Hauls and opened up the back hatch. Luther winced a little as the sight of boxes upon boxes greeted his eyes. "These all belong on the third floor. You'll take a left in the 'all way and it'll be the last room on your right. Did you get tha'?" 


"Yes, Mr. O'Brian," replied Luther. He was still trying to soak in the daunting task ahead of him and wondered whether or not it was still worth it, half a days pay or not.


"I'll need yah to be quick about it though. The Ricardo family will be 'ere in three hours and the doctor 'as asked us to be either done or close to finishin' by the time he and his family arrived. And thas what I plan to do."


Luther looked down at O'Brian and blinked. "Wait, they'll be here in three hours?" Definitely worth it.


"Aye," said the man as he heaved one of the boxes out of the truck and into the boys arms. "So you better get to work now. And don't be snoopin' around the 'ouse either, yah hear? If my boss hears that i let a non-mover into the Ricardo Mansion then you can bet your sweet potaters that I'll be hunting your ass down." With that, the man turned and resumed his post down with the other men.


Luther nodded a silent "OK" as the short man walked off and quickly headed into the house through the double door entrance, clutching the box in his arms tightly. As he entered, he was instantly struck breathless by the stunning entranceway of the mansion. A three tiered diamond jeweled chandelier hung majestically from the domed ceiling, illuminating the intricate pattern made by the spanish tiles on the floor. A double staircase sloped gracefully up and curved to meet the second level hallway where Luther was able to get a glimpse of the entrance to what he assumed was a spiraled staircase, disappearing after the first curve up into the house.


"That must lead to the third level," Luther mumbled to himself.


"What'd ya say," grunted one of the men as he passed by the boy, a rather intimidating look on his face.


"N- Nothing," Luther stammered in response. He gulped and quickly crossed the floor, making his way up one of the staircases before stopping at the top to catch his breath. The box in his arms was starting to feel like a heavy metal weight and Luther was beginning to doubt his capability of completing his task. 

'Keep going. You might get to see this Shava chick.' His heart flipped in his chest as his silent reminder sparked his adrenaline. He strode over to what he assumed was the spiraled staircase and slowly started to make his way to the third floor.


-------


Everyone wishes they had a short, burly, generic Irish man named O'Brian to call their own.


I know I do.

Sunday

10.

dear me,


you are not a failure. your eyes are

brighter than you think and are

windows to your mind. life is not a

war to win or a game to play, but a

journey to travel.



dear me,


god plays hide-and-seek. learn

from angels and see how they

do. take joy in the small things

and start to notice details, like

the way the sun hits his eyes or

the blue veins running fiercely

under your skin. leave the big picture

up to someone else, someone bigger

than yourself.



dear me,


everything happens for a reason.

embrace change like it was the air

in your bones. look at the world

with eyes wide shut and see it how

a child sees it;


perfect, pure, magical



dear me,


magical. you are magical.

keep yourself around for awhile.




sincerely,


poem


-----


Sometimes you just need a simple reminder of who you are.